One Year Anniversary - Part II (Our Engagement Story)

Hello, friends! Happy THURSDAY! (We're almost there!) In a mushy little anniversary series, here is part II (rewinding here)--the little engagement story I wrote shortly after Thomas proposed to me. I hope you enjoy it! 

Having a Guinness at the spot we met at for the first time--Tavern On the Square

I am the oldest thirty something you will ever meet. By "oldest,” I don't mean that I lack energy or that I'm boring; I was simply born in the wrong era. My favorite TV music station is “Singers and Swing,” where crooners like Billie Holiday and Dean Martin--born before my time--belt out old tunes. Early on, Thomas and I developed a love for putting the “Singers and Swing” TV station on, lighting candles, eating dinner, toasting our relationship and slow dancing to the music of our past, kindred spirits. It became "our thing.” Romantic moments such as these made us daydream (as we affectionately labeled our thinking of marriage) often. Early on, when speaking hypothetically of the future, I asked only one thing of a potential proposal: that it be private, between just the two of us. I wanted no onlookers or fanfare. Thomas did not fail to deliver.

One of our many homemade dinners by candlelight.

In late March, I asked my Aunt Margaret if she'd like to get together sometime to look at engagement rings. I assured her that I had no announcement to make, but that I realized I had absolutely no idea what type of a ring I might like if/when I should get engaged, and that it might be nice to get some idea in the event that Thomas ever asked for an opinion on rings. My aunt happily obliged, setting up an appointment that week.

What I envisioned being a simple glass of wine and perusing of rings online became a full-blown event. I arrived to my aunt's to find a rather fancy affair. Before my eyes were olives, fancy cheese, crackers, wine, and an onslaught of bridal magazines! I laughed merrily at the to-do and settled in to start looking. At one point, I had to laugh as we had two laptops playing diamond ring videos simultaneously. What a night. My Aunt produced impromptu organizational folders for various categories of wedding planning. I took a picture of the chaos and sent it to Thomas via text, showing him what I was engaged in. I didn't think it was evident WHAT we were up to, but apparently one of the bridal magazines screamed out to him. I blushed at my oversight. I texted him asking him if he minded if I stopped by for a minute before heading home; he didn't.

When I arrived to Thomas’, one of the first things he said was, “We haven’t slow danced to our station in awhile, so I wondered if  you’d like to dance with me?” as he turned the television  to our “Singers & Swing” station. I threw my purse down, happily obliged and without missing a beat, lit some nearby candles. Thomas smiled at my participation in the creation of the ambience. As we began to dance, and as our old friends crooned in the background, I began explaining the picture that was sent to him. I told him I had only planned on looking at rings with my Aunt to get an idea of a ring for if and  when I were ever to wed.  I admitted that she had created folders for different parts of this wedding. Tongue-in-cheek and very sarcastically, I assured him he needn’t worry as this all had “NOTHING to do with him.” As we continued to rock back and forth to the music, I heard this reply escape his lips: I hope it has something to do with me. In what seemed to be slow motion (and a seemingly out of body experience for me) I saw Thomas drop to his knee, pull something sparkly out and ask me, “Will you marry me?” To say I was stunned would be the grossest understatement.

In preparation for our honeymoon trip to Italy, Thomas and I took Italian classes. During the first class, he passed me this note. :)

Now, those who know us well would probably retort at my saying I was surprised. After all, Thomas and I had our children’s names picked out before our first official date. We’ve just always had a connection that was like something from out of a storybook -- other worldly. To bring a dream world and an everyday reality together, though, is something I was unsure would ever happen for me. After shock and many joyful tears, Thomas asked me, “Is that a yes?” Stunned that I’d forgotten to actually reply, I cried and laughed a “yes.”

I couldn’t wait until the next day to tell everyone, so I got on the phone to spread the news. The good thing about having a family that is as close is mine is you always have someone to listen to you, to share special moments with, to laugh and cry with. The bad thing about having a family as close is mine is it’s hard to keep anything a secret. Knowing the difficulty in keeping things a secret, I knew I had to call the entire Lansing family or by morning, those who hadn’t heard from me, would already know. Luckily, I was able to reach everyone but my sister-in-law, for whom I left a voicemail.

I know myself pretty well, and I know I don’t sleep well on a night where there is NOTHING on my mind. I knew I wouldn’t sleep with such a huge, joyous moment dancing around in my head. I must have awoken at least six times that night. Each time, I scrambled to see the ring twinkling in the dead of night. I had the wonderful realization that I was engaged to Thomas—and that it was not a dream—washing over me, again and again. I’d smile and fall clumsily back to sleep.

The night of the engagement, Thomas told me he’d thought of a million ways to propose to me—different locations, grandiose presentations, but that in his apartment, dancing to “Singers & Swing” was just “us.” I appreciated the care he took to make sure it was simple and private. Any “big date” would have clued me in on what was about to happen and would have been distracting. With such a simple and perfect moment in his apartment, I was able to keenly focus on what was happening, take in everything along the way, and be TRULY SURPRISED.

A very cool "poster" Thomas made me when he was courting me. This was a nod to my years working in the entertainment business. 

Understanding me is only a part of why I love Thomas so much, but it’s one of the most important reasons. I’m a complete paradox in almost every way you can imagine.  I’m a rather shy and awkward individual (contrary to what my outer appearance may scream) who engages in heavy thinking, but also enjoys the light hearted fabulousness that would make the Bravo channel envious. I am a feminist and revel in modern day technology, yet I enjoy the simplicity of yesteryear and mourn the loss of one-on-one contact that existed before great technology. I feared no one would ever be able to see past these exteriors that I present to understand me, but Thomas did. Not only did he see past them, he revered what was behind them and loved them.

For as long as my mental and physical health will allow, I look forward to more of the things we do: toasting to nothing in particular other than a wonderful day, holding hands, watching the sun set, falling in a pile of autumn leaves, making snow angels, smiling at one another and knowing exactly what the other is thinking, sighing in unison at a beautiful moment, understanding one another’s weaknesses and strengths, and enjoying the hum drum of life in a way that makes it anything but hum drum. And talking. Talking, talking, talking until the wonderfully positive or negative moment you’ve endured has been completely lifted from your heart. Knowing you can do so and be free of judgment is the most freeing thing I can imagine. I look forward to so many things with Thomas, but this all could have not been possible without those four little words—“will you marry me?”—and the resounding reply of “YES.”  I can only wish such positive and beautiful moments upon the hearts, minds and souls of those reading these words.

One of our engagement photos. We met through a City Pulse reporter. 

My Thomas made this. 2012--the year we solidified our love. Our "love campaign".

Cheers,

Samara